


Will I have to say goodbye?

by destielsuperwholockbandhoorah



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Middle School, Fluff, M/M, Merthur - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-03
Updated: 2015-06-03
Packaged: 2018-04-02 17:47:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4068934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/destielsuperwholockbandhoorah/pseuds/destielsuperwholockbandhoorah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Merlin sits next to Arthur every day on the bus, and the two have become good friends. But the school year is drawing to a close and Merlin is worried that they will never get any more chances to talk.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Will I have to say goodbye?

**Author's Note:**

> The first half of this fic is based off of my friend's experience with someone she likes who she sits next to on the bus, and she wanted me to fic it for her. Which I did, obviously, and itsis such a cute story even without what I have added in at the end!!! So this is for you, Kayla. ♡

Merlin smiled to himself. It was almost the end of the school day, which was good for several reasons. The most obvious one being, of course, that school was over and he could leave that hellhole they called education, and the other reason was that he was about to get on the bus, to sit next the person who was one of the highlights of his school day.

The bell rang and he picked up his backpack, swinging it onto his shoulder and making his way out the door, through the hallways, and onto the bus with the crowds of other students that were leaving too. When Merlin climbed onto the bus, he wasn’t there yet, and so Merlin plopped down in the seat and pulled out his phone, hoping that Arthur would be there that day so that the two of them could talk.

He scrolled through some photos boredly, until he saw a familiar head of blonde hair pass by his window, and then he stowed the phone back in his pocket and tried to act cool while he totally didn’t stare at Arthur as he got on the bus.

“Hey Merlin,” Arthur smiled as he sat down, and Merlin couldn’t help smiling back at him.

“Hey,” Merlin scooted over a little to giver Arthur room, his shoulder leaning into the cool metal side of the bus.

Merlin and Arthur had technically known each other for a couple of years, since they had always been on the bus together, but they started sitting together and talking consistently pretty recently, a couple of months ago, and this had led to Merlin gaining a crush on the other boy that was pretty sizable. The problem was, Arthur was two years older than him, Merlin was going to get homeschooled the next year instead of coming back to that school, and the school year was almost over. Merlin was always wishing they could stop the awkwardness and exchange numbers, because frankly, it was killing him that the two of them would never talk after that school year finished if they didn’t do something.

“So how was your day?” Merlin asked, turning a bit towards Arthur and leaning his back on the wall of the bus.

Arthur smiled and turned towards him to answer, telling him some odd story about what had happened in science that day. It often went like this, and they would talk for nearly the whole bus ride until they got to Merlin’s stop and he had to get off the bus. He would look back to maybe see Arthur, except the windows of the bus were a bit too dark to really see back into it. But he liked to image that Arthur was smiling at him as the bus left. Merlin himself never really smiled as much as he did when he was talking to Arthur. The effect even managed to last all the way home after getting off the bus. He didn’t know what to do about that, really.

The crush was a strange one, Merlin didn’t really understand it. All he knew was that Arthur was kind and sweet and amazing, and that the thought of losing Arthur scared him. He was one of the only decent people at that stupid school. One of the only things that Merlin would miss when he left.

Of course there were days that Arthur wasn’t on the bus for whatever reason. Those days, Merlin spent his time curled up on the far window side of the seat, face in his phone, trying to ignore whatever stupid dollophead that decided to sit next to him that day and trying badly not to get too upset that he was on his own that day. If he was lucky, they left the small little seventh grader who so obviously didn’t want to talk to them alone, but there were days where Merlin just wanted to yell at the twerp next to him to fuck off, they weren’t the person he wanted to talk to.

It wasn’t a nice feeling, to feel the bus pulling away without that familiar face beside him, and Merlin tried to ignore how much it seemed to get to him.

Merlin really liked talking to Arthur. He seemed so at ease with everything. Like he was comfortable in his own skin. Nothing really phased him. Merlin knew that he himself could be pretty awkward, he was pretty good at joking around and stuff, but often the inner awkwardness shone through and he said something he didn’t really mean too, things that maybe he shouldn’t say, or maybe he’d speak too fast and trip over his words or have to repeat himself, and basically he was really good at embarrassing himself, but Arthur never seemed bothered. He took everything in stride, letting whatever Merlin had done slip by, or making a lighthearted joke about it, and moving on.

He was just so easy to talk with, Merlin could be himself with Arthur. Though he did find himself blushing more than he would like, and was constantly hoping that Arthur didn’t notice too much and figure out how much Merlin liked him. He was always hoping that Arthur didn’t notice how Merlin’s eyes lingered on him, how he smiled so wide that sometimes he wondered if his face would split in two, how he laughed a little too loudly and stumbled over his words a little too often, or how the redness remained on his cheeks whenever Arthur said something nice.

Merlin sometimes wished that the school year didn’t have to end, and then remembered that he hated it there. He just wished that there was something he could do that didn’t involve embarrassing himself or any form of rejection or anything. He had been texting with his friend Gwen about it, and she was encouraging him to just ask for his number already. She told him, “He seems really sweet, even if you guys just stay friends it would be worth it. I think you should give it a shot.” Merlin was considering it.

It always cheered Merlin up a little to see Arthur on the bus, which he really needed, as he’d been having an increasing amount of not so great days recently, but one day, he needed it a lot more than before. It was one of those days where everything is basically going to shit, everything piles up on everything else and he just wasn’t able to hold it all up.

Merlin’s last class that day was gym, and he was nearly out for the day, but he just needed a break. So he left to go to the bathroom, to get away from people mostly, and to fight down the urge to cry. He stood there in front of the mirror, wishing he could let it out but knowing he couldn’t. His hands were braced on the sink, and he could see the wetness in his own eyes, which were a little red from exhaustion and the almost-tears. He breathed in deeply and rubbed at his eyes quickly. Then some other guy came into the bathroom. Merlin straightened up and coughed a little, then washed his hands and left the bathroom, dragging his feet all the way back to class.

He walked quietly back to his seat on the gym floor. Thankfully, the excuse, “I don’t feel well,” had worked once again, and Merlin had been allowed to sit out. He _hated_ gym with a burning passion. All that running and getting yelled at and getting hit with balls by people he hated, yeah not really his style. So he got out of it as much as he was able to. He was walking back, hands in his pockets and not really looking around, when all of a sudden he was hit square in the chest by a ball. _Hard._

Merlin stumbled backwards, wheezing, trying to breath and unable to. He looked up through the tears forming in his eyes to see who had hit him and of _course_ it was Percival. That kid was huge, and he seriously needed to tone it down with his hard throws before someone got hurt- _oh wait._

Merlin turned on his heel and left the gym as fast as he could. His lungs were burning and he couldn’t breathe and he was 90% sure he was dying. He gasped for breath, leaning up against the wall outside of the gym, clutching his arms around himself and trying not to sob. He just wanted to get out of there. And so he did. He went and got his stuff together and he left, not caring at all about the repercussions and wanting nothing more than to be home wrapped up in a blanket or something and out of this place for good. He climbed on the bus, which was thankfully already there and waiting, despite school not being out yet. He just stayed in his seat, scrunched down, leaning his head against the seat back in front of him and waiting for school to end so that everyone could get on the bus and he could go home. He was glad to have the time to himself though. There was one other kid there, who seemed to have gotten out of class early as well, and so the bus was pretty much silent, save Merlin’s quiet gasping. By the time other people started to get on, he could breathe almost normal, but it still hurt.

He didn’t even see Arthur until he was sitting down next to Merlin, and saying, “wow, you guys are already on the bus?”

“We were in gym.” Merlin managed, but really doesn’t want to talk, which is a first, at least with Arthur, but he can barely breathe right and it hurt to talk, and he was really just done with humanity at that point in the day, no matter how cute humanity’s stupid concerned face was.

Merlin could feel Arthur looking at him, and turned away, not wanting the other boy to see the tears that were burning in his eyes and wanting to fall. He hunched up more, putting the knuckles of his fist to his mouth and willing Arthur to just say something, to ask, to comfort him, just anything. But as the minutes rolled by and the bus pulled out of the parking lot onto the street, Merlin was pretty sure that Arthur wasn’t going to say anything. Could he even tell? He had turned away from Merlin, and yeah, that hurt, it really hurt, and today had put enough on him that he wasn’t really sure he could take this, one of the only people he actually liked talking to and felt like they like talking back to him, had just turned away without a word when Merlin was so obviously not okay. He had straightened up and was sitting quietly staring at his hands, clenching his teeth together and for once willing the bus to move faster.

But then there was a tap on Merlin’s shoulder and he turned, having to make an effort to not look surprised, and saw Arthur holding out a note, a little red faced but obviously concerned. So Merlin took the note with an oddly neutral expression and hunched back into the seat to read it. It was this folded up little piece of paper, and unfolded it read, in slightly messy but readable handwriting, “You okay? You seem a bit stressed.” Merlin would have laughed at the understatement there except oh wow Arthur really did care and noticed and he handed him a note how freaking cute is that?!? And basically he wanted to hug Arthur except that would probably be a little weird and so he didn’t, but he was about to reply when some asshole decided that three people in a seat was a good idea, and sat down next to Arthur, squishing them together, pushing Merlin into the window and basically making it the most awkward next ten minutes of a bus ride ever. Thankfully, they got off the bus soon and Merlin and Arthur were left sort of alone again.

That was when Arthur handed another note over to Merlin, who opened it carefully and read, “hey well if you ever need anyone to talk to here’s my telephone number. Text me anytime.” And next to that there was a carefully written set of ten digits. Merlin couldn’t help the smile that spread over his face then. He knew he looked like an idiot but really, he didn’t care, and didn’t care that Arthur could see him smiling like an idiot because he had Arthur’s number and a bad day had just taken a little turn. Well, of course he still felt like shit but at least he had this now.

He would have said something, but the bus was pulling up to his stop and he had to grab his stuff and stick the note in their pocket and get off the bus. He had only time for a glance back and a, “Bye, Arthur,” and hear Arthur answer back, “Have a nice day,” before he was off the bus and looking back at the tinted window wondering if Arthur was looking back at him.

Merlin went straight to his room and dropped his backpack on the ground, feeling the burn of the smile in his cheeks as he pulled out his phone and flopped on his bed to text Gwen so he could freak out about this to someone.

They had a conversation mostly in capitals about what had just happened, which consisted a lot of Gwen saying, “Awww, that’s so sweet!” and Merlin feeling a blush in his cheeks as he responded with, “shut up xD”

Then they made a small plan of action where Merlin texted Arthur for the first time. Merlin really wanted to explain what had happened that day to him, so that Arthur understood and didn’t think that Merlin had just been being petty or rude or whatever. So Merlin took out the notes and looked at them for a minute, before sticking them in his notebook and pulling out his phone again in order to text Arthur.

 _It’s not a huge deal, calm down,_ he told himself, taking a breath and copying over what he had sent as a draft to Gwen, going over it, and closing his eyes and pressing send.

He tried not to stare at the phone, tried to not check it all that often, waiting for the message to be read and then replied to, and spent a good twenty minutes, probably more, fretting about it all before Arthur replied, being his usual sweet self, and all the worry drained out of Merlin’s limbs for the time being.

After that, they texted pretty regularly. Not all the time, not about everything, but they had a pretty decent conversation that ran during the day after school, and occasionally during school at times when they both had access to their phones. It brightened Merlin’s days considerably. Though of course it didn’t really fix any of the things that were putting him down, but he had more happiness to fight back with, and that felt really good.

Not to mention his growing crush on the older boy. Arthur was brave and kind and selfless. He could be kind of a prat at times, but Merlin saw through it and they grew fast pretty close. The school year drew to a close unclimactically within the next few weeks, and then suddenly summer was looming before them, followed by a next school year that already seemed too close. Merlin was just glad that Gaius had agreed to homeschool him so that he could stop going through that torture every day.

He’d miss Arthur though. That last day on the bus ride him, they’d talked about summer plans, dancing around the fact that they wouldn’t see each other every day anymore, until as Merlin was getting up, Arthur grabbed hold of his sleeve and said, “I’ll miss you, Merlin.”

Merlin swallowed and smiled, a little sadly. “I’ll miss you too, Arthur.”

“I’ll text you, loads,” Arthur grinned.

“Definitely,” Merlin returned the smile a little more enthusiastically before Arthur let the sleeve of Merlin’s blue jacket slip from his fingers, and Merlin gave him a last grin before walking off the bus, at war within himself over the happiness and the sadness about everything.

That day, when he looked back, Arthur had pushed down the window (which they really were not supposed to do) and waved to him as the bus pulled away.

Merlin waved back, he waved until the bus turned the corner and didn’t even care if that was silly or not. If he wasn’t going to be seeing Arthur very much, he was gonna be as silly as he could be because why not.

They did text even more than usual during the summer, since they didn’t get to talk in person at all. And since school was over, Merlin was usually in a much better mood, which resulted in a lot of banter going between them, as well as lots of what may have been flirting, but he honestly wasn’t sure. He really missed seeing Arthur’s face, both because he like his cute blonde haired head and his smile, and simply because talking to someone and being able to see their face is somehow such a better feeling than black and white words. Maybe they could Skype at some point. _Whoa Merlin don’t get ahead of yourself there._ Merlin shook his head to himself and smiled.

One day though, something did advance a little.

“Hey, do you wanna maybe meet me somewhere and go do something?” Arthur sent.

Merlin had to sit there and stare at the message. Going out of the house and actually doing things was not really what he did, you could ask anyone around him. But he really wanted to see Arthur and here was this opportunity offered up on a silver platter, he would be a fool not to take it.

So he texted back and said yes, of course he would like to meet up, and what did he have in mind?

They ended up making plans for this silly sci-fi movie that they were playing at a theater that was close by, and Merlin got a skeptical Gaius to drive him over there later that day. Merlin had tried not to fuss over his clothes and his hair before he came, because of course this was just a friend thing, but he couldn’t really help it. He was nervous, seeing Arthur outside of being on the bus was a strange prospect. His hands were shaking slightly as he got out of the car and looked around for Arthur.

He saw him standing by the ticket counter, lounging against a rail, and felt his heart jump for his mouth. Here he went. He swallowed and began to walk towards Arthur, who saw him when he was about halfway there and came to meet him.

“Merlin! Good to see you!” He called, when he was almost to Merlin.

“Yeah, you too, you prat,” Merlin laughed, and then they reached each other. Neither of them was really sure who had decided to hug, but then they were hugging, and it felt good. Merlin didn’t want to let go, but he knew he had to.

“I already got us tickets.” Arthur told him, beginning to walk towards the entrance doors of the theater.

Merlin ran a couple steps to catch up. “Oh no, you didn’t have to-”

“It’s fine,” Arthur brushed it off. “I wanted to.”

And Merlin couldn’t exactly argue with that, so switched the conversation topic as they entered the theater and headed towards the right one. They settled down in their seats in the theater quietly, then continued their conversation in hushed voices, ignoring the person in front of them who turned around a glared whenever they laughed. Arthur wasn’t very good at staying quiet.

Soon enough the movie started, and it was something they both actually wanted to pay attention to, so there was a very limited amount of talking during it. It was a good movie, though the most notable part of it came about three quarters of the way through it, when Merlin felt something brush against his hand and turned to see Arthur’s hand sitting awkwardly on the armrest next to his.

Merlin was still just sitting there looking at Arthur when Arthur turned his head shyly to look at Merlin, and gave him such a sweet, small little smile that Merlin reached out right then and took Arthur’s hand, as it seemed Arthur had been trying to do before. For a split second, due to the expression of surprise on Arthur’s face, Merlin thought he had made a terrible mistake and ruined everything that they had ever had as a friendship, but then Arthur smiled even brighter than Merlin might have ever seen, and squeezed his fingers a little before turning back to the movie.

Merlin thought that he might combust. It was everything, Arthur’s smile, his own smile, the blush heating up his entire face, the warmth and comfort coming from the hand in his. Everything was perfect, and he was almost scared for the movie to end, worried that it would all dry up and float away in the sun and light outside the theater.

But the thing was, it didn’t. Arthur held his hand all the way through the rest of the movie, and out of their seats and through the lobby out into the sun, and Merlin held onto him tightly, scared of losing him.

“Merlin,” Arthur said, in a serious voice, when they were standing outside, “I need to ask you something.”

Naturally, Merlin was instantly worried, and felt the drop in his stomach at the words. There was no smile on Arthur’s face, only a solemnity that was obviously masking something else, and that was really disquieting.

“What is it?” Merlin asked, turning to face Arthur, hoping that his voice didn’t betray his emotions.

“Well,” Arthur began, his face slipping a little so that he looked like he was trying to cover up being nervous and doing a really bad job at it. “I had a really good time today, and I think you probably did too, and I know we don’t get to see each other much, but I really want to see you more and was wondering if you would maybe be- I know I’m two years older than you and that might be off-putting, but- I was wondering whether you would maybe like tobemyboyfriend?” The last words came out in a rush and Merlin barely caught them, but he heard well enough, and he was feeling a bit shell shocked.

“Me- be your-?” Merlin tried not to splutter.

Arthur looked extremely put down, “I knew it was a silly question, I guess I was wrong then, I’m really sor-”

“No!” Merlin interrupted! “No, I mean yes, I mean arg.” He stopped and took a deep breath while Arthur looked at him with a confused expression. “I would very much like to be your boyfriend,” Merlin managed to say, giving Arthur a small smile. And then, since he was feeling daring, he leaned forward and kissed Arthur quickly on the corner of his mouth. When he pulled back, he saw Arthur looking at him with such an expression that he thought he might combust all over again.

They both stood there quietly, just looking at each other with big dopey grins on their faces, until there was a sharp honk of a horn, and the both looked over to see Gaius waiting in the car out in front of the theater.

Merlin sighed a little, wishing he could have more face to face time with Arthur. Maybe a movie wasn’t the best occasion for that, but he had been glad that it was a movie. The dark of the movie theater gave him courage. But next time, _next date_ actually, they would have to plan something a little better.

“Well I have to go,” Merlin said apologetically, taking a step back and reluctantly letting his hand slide from Arthur’s. “I’ll text you later, okay?”

“Yeah,” Arthur replied, smiling after Merlin and giving him a small wave that Merlin returned as he turned backwards a little on his way to Gaius’ car. He felt happy and warm inside, and couldn’t stop smiling. He couldn’t wait till next time.


End file.
